Stupid resolutions

Who in the bloody hell decided that New Year's resolutions are a good idea?  Why do we choose to be absolute gluttons over Thanksgiving and Christmas and then wipe the slate clean on New Year's Day?

At any rate, I decided to be super-cliche this year and make one of my New Year's Resolutions to lose weight.  I figure that I really only have one more month of using the old I-just-had-a-baby routine as an excuse for my fat ass, so I have been on alert for a good work-out plan.  And since I'm starting this new job in 3 days (yay!) I need something to counter the fact that I will be working more from a desk and I don't want to gain a ton of weight because of that.  Also, since we are being honest, I hate dieting.  I hate saying "no" to dessert and I hate choosing grilled veggies over french fries at a restaurant.  So in an attempt to keep my sanity and (hopefully) stick with this new plan I have decided to try just working out first and not making any changes to my diet.  Then we I plateau with my weight loss, I will change up my diet.  One of the women that I "know" from the bump started a blog for weight loss after the new year and I decided to check it out.  All I needed was a set of hand weights and this workout DVD. 

Lemme tell you something.  That DVD and set of weights sat in the bottom of my closet in the Wal-Mart bag in which they were purchased for a good 2 weeks.  I was scared.  I was too damn scared of getting my huge ass (okay, fine.  I know that I don't have an ass, but rather a huge gut.) off the couch and putting a DVD in.  I knew that once I opened the package, there was no turning back.  But I also knew that I had made a committment (one of my online friends as well as my in-real-life best friend decided that we were going to be cheerleaders for each other) and I had to stick with it. 

Then I got ambitious.  I opened the DVD.  I put it in the DVD player.  I sat on the couch to watch it.  Then ::gasp:: I peeled myself off of my couch and did the workout routine.

And now I'm so sore.  I'm so sore that I could barely lift my arms above my head to wash my hair today.  It actually hurt to sit on the damn toilet to pee today.  It hurt to lift my sweet babies up in the air.  I'm not even embarassed to admit that I cried when I was doing push-ups.  The girl kind of push-ups.  ::Sigh::  That bitch better be right about loosing 20 pounds in 30 days.  If not, I might stab somebody.